in this expanse
self
it seems as if i am caught between a rock and a hard place, that life has caught up and now decisions have to be made and put into process. Normally this would not be a problem but I feel as if You have caused this time of reflection, this space of clarity to draw me closer to you. Im not gonna lie, I dont like it. My flesh yearns for control, it wants to fix things and it wants to own responsibility. But I know more than ever, now and from my past, that all control belongs to you.
Your Word tells me that you Word is a lamp unto my feet and that direction comes from you. I’m struggling to believe and give full control to you over my feelings and my future. I feel like if I don’t govern my life, my decisions, my hopes and desires then they will be taken from me. I feel like I am double sided, I have faith in all areas except this one. Maybe because I have been hurt before, but I know You are not at fault in that, that is what happens when I control the situation.
i know you are good, You are faithful and Your promises ENDURE!!!!
i put my trust in You! I know that what you have given me, given us, is for real, i rest assure in your peace that is beyond understanding.
i will rest, i will be clarified, i will be guided by You
dear friend,
take a piece of your own advice. settle down, breathe, and live! it will come- don’t force it. and your passions, your desires will be made to life because of its foundation in God.
your heart (resting)
a quick list
1. I hate goodbyes
2. Letters are fun!
3. Life is always an adventure
4. I got my first tattoo today
5. Passion is a MUST
Animating Drizzles
This rainy day, I sit still and collect my thoughts
They bring me to my fathers throne
Knowing that my joy and substance is found constant in my savior
The dreary mist to me has never been of somber injustice,
But of a peaceful revitalization of my spirit.
Showing me restoration of life.
That encourages the deepest loathes.
Puddles and splashes invigorating watery substances
That point to the pure spring of life.
The cool September breeze whips through the trees
Showing all creation submitting to the creator’s authority.
I guess it was His grace that saw fit to overflow ever more on this day
To speak breathe into my thirsting lungs.
launch
Here is a brief video I shot during sound check for Harvest Bible Chapel today!!!
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=519006300906&saved#/video/video.php?v=519006300906
distance? no
one ride
two exuberant longings to fulfill one passion.
a giving it away
created wanting by the orchestral symphonic himself.
you seem so far away,
but your voice gets softer every day.
the immediate awe-struck intention of attention.
loud enough to pierce the ears of the mute and unconvienced.
who said we cant be?
exploding, like a flame in the dark.
too hot to handle
burned by the reflecting everglow.
CANT be contained
CANT be reserved
She has this effect that is simply……
unsurpassing to others.dis
captivating to behold
and all the while the same moon shines on our wandering hearts
as eyes meet in the stratosphere
and although distance seems to tear at us
the concluding affection is united
on a moonlight diaspora.
not enough…..
Time that was so short
but seemed like years
as the world stopped
when you were in my arms,
the distance could never seem too far
and your heart could never fall away
the fantasy poured into reality
making fairy tale a life
of one night and half a day
crowning a thirst mesmerized
speaking of the what lies ahead
uncertainty, of what might be
but, certainty of a determined desire
a smile that brightens a jet black room
sparks of what will be when finally set free
frenzies of life, animating a true parallel
of two second to none that no one can replicate
things i have noticed
There are some things that I have been noticing as I have been visiting churches in the area and helping out with a new church plant here called Harvest Bible Chapel. These things are some things that I believe need to be done in order to be effective and so I will share them with you in list form.
1. New attendee / member follow up
Of the churches that I have visited it took over a week to follow up and it was done via email and mail. Though it was informative, it lacked a true concern for myself or an individual to continue attending. We have got to make sure we are doing everything we can to connect with individuals in an intimate, intentional manner. This means phone calls, visitation and meetings are primary and emails and mail are secondary.
2. Information
In this day and age the internet serves as the most applicable tool for individuals to find information. This is why a website MUST be user friendly, quick and concise. Anything that an individual may want to find out needs to be able to be easily obtained; this means (directions, phone #’s, addresses, staff, emails, mission statement, vision, and so forth…).
3. Outside Community Involvement
One thing that I have come to realize is that community involvement and the need to be in community is vital as believers. If we are truly united as the bride then this needs to be apparent. Churches need to let their congregations know what is going on, have them plugged in and serving someone other than themselves, disciplining and living out the actuality of the church. This means eating together, meeting and having fun, sharing and giving sacrificially so that others may be able to. Francis Chan once said that he quit his life insurance policy for him and his family because he believed in his church and the people that surrounded him that much. Can we do that? Honestly? Serving together is key, so churches- DO IT!! and be clear that’s what your about.
august evening street corner
chirping, echoes
two, very distinct rhythms
one, continuous carpet laying foundation
the other, powerful, distinct surges
glaring rays of radiance
casting shadows upon objects
setting the stage for vision and darkness,
which hides and lurks
yet all stems from a sole illumination
where does the side walk end?
it curves and bends
escorting me to my purpose
further and beyond seems like a dream.
maybe on day adventure will arise
coming and going
who knows occasion or desire
a means of the path
and suddenly its gone
rock, compressed, unforgiving labyrinth
patches of stunning emerald in between
longing to stay, to meet, to know
temporal vacation ushers me back to security
city
Baltimore Day 3
We started off the day getting a good night sleep and waking up around 8:30. We all took showers, which felt lovely, but we had to put on the same clothes from the week. We went down stairs and ate some cereal. The day before we found out about a house called the Don Miller house where individuals who had infirmities paid to live in community and volunteers and interns would take care of them. It was also not too far from where we stayed at John’s house. So we walked about a mile or so to the Don Miller House and met Cara who is a student worker / intern for a year with the program. Since we were unexpected she really didn’t have anything for us to do. So we met some of the attendants and went outside and did some yard work. We cleaned up the back yard, raked up some leaves and made the patio ready for spring. Just talking to her we arranged to come back the next day and cook dinner for the two houses. So tomorrow for dinner we are coming back! If felt so good to help out after most of the places like the school café, restaurants and gas stations turned us down.
It was lunchtime and we were walking back from the House, Russ was talking about getting food for Popeyes. So I said, “I’m going to DD.” As I walked around the side of the building, there it stood. A blue, heaven of treasure called a dumpster. I immediately opened the dumpster but only after Russ told me to look around for cameras and ripped open the first bag I saw. Nathan yells, “Is it good? While Chase yells put it back and I yell back in response, I got it.” And Nathan in excitement exclaims “Yahtzee!!” We bring the booty back to the house and had a picnic on the front porch. We shot a video and enjoyed our spoils, but not with out Nathan almost throwing up and he finds the dirty side of the bag filled with dirt, hair and debris from the ground as he bites into a cream filled doughnut. We salvaged as many as we could to eat for the remainder of the week and threw away the original bag.
We picked up a football from the Holy Comforter Lutheran Church so that we could try and build some relationships with students at Loyola, but no one wanted to play even after we would intentionally throw a pass long for some one to pick up. As Russ and Nathan uploaded the video inside the Library, Chase and I played catch outside. The guy we talked to the night before on the shuttle walked by as we were throwing and said hello by saying, “Hey it’s the Christian guys!” It was great to talk to him and to be recognized by someone on campus. We walked over to their quad and began to throw the football. It was a lot of fun and relaxing but again no one wanted to play. The guy we met the day before, Nick, who plays on the Ultimate Club team at Loyola, walked up with a disc! I honestly missed playing disc and I wish it were one of the interns we could of brought with us. So we threw and talked. We went to the café and chilled out for a minute waiting to see if the lady we met the night before was working at the Salad bar. Lashae was busy so we talked for a minute and then peaced out.
At this point we really did not know what to do so we dropped into campus ministries to try and find something. Whoooo! I am glad that we did. Chase and I met so many people. They were so blown away at what we were doing. It was refreshing to talk with students and just chill. We exchanged numbers with Sammy Jo in hopes of meeting up later to hang out with our new friends. Dennis, the CCSJ director, hooked us up with $20 bus fare and an opportunity to serve later in a few hours handing out sandwiches and drinks the people that were homeless. We rode the back downtown and it was so much better than walking that six and a half miles. We arrived at the place and as we were standing on the corner, Anderson University’s bus drove by us honking and screaming. It was good to see them!
We met Kenneth before we started handing out sandwiches and talked with him. It was awesome! I’m sure he will be on my mind for a while. We helped the Loyola students pass out the food, but not too many came. I talked the whole time with Laura, Lauren and Christina. All three were Catholics, but Laura had been hanging out with Christians in community at Loyola and neighboring universities. I had the opportunity to encourage her to keep seeking out a community of believers. There was quite a bit of food left over, 8 bags of sandwiches, so we were able to take them to the shelter that we stayed out on Sunday night, but not before we called fives one of the bags for ourselves. The director, Tim Tim, was excited to see us when we returned. I am definitely going to write back him when I return. We had to catch the 11 bus to get back to the Loyola University. A lady I met on the bus told us to catch the 8 also so in a hurry we got off at the next stop and she walked us to the correct bus stop that we needed to be at. It was a bad part of town and it was dark already also. She made sure to tell us to stick together and not to go anywhere and wait for the bus. I am very glad she took care of us because if she had not then we would have to walk all the way through the bad neighborhoods. We finally back to the house and the bus dropped us off right in front of it. We prayed with John and Celestine. It was an awesome time of prayer. We walked up stairs and realized that Chase lost the football that we had borrowed from the church. Hanging with the guys that night was a lot of fun.
